Why is it that some mornings I wake up feeling like I can conquer the world? I can take on any task and give myself credit for at least trying even if I can’t complete it. I can feel good about where I am in life. And then a simple word from someone or an interaction can change everything and make me feel defeated.
Why is it that some mornings I feel like I’m defeated before I even get out of bed?
Why do I react to some people the way I do: judging them and being critical?
Why do I let the need of some people to feel superior make me feel inferior? Why can’t I accept that they need to be first, be right, be “in the know” and allow them that, without feeling like I have to compete? Or that I don’t measure up?
Why do I so easily feel left out when I clearly have so much and so many who support and encourage me?
Why do I feel pangs of jealousy and envy over others’ triumphs? I love these folks – why can’t my love be pure and rejoice in their victories? I am ashamed when I consider all God has done for me and blessed me with.
Why do I let some people get under my skin and aggravate me? Why am I not quick to recall that God loves them just as much as HE loves me.
Will I ever master these thoughts and feelings? Will I always struggle this way?
I have been a believer for over forty years and I know the spirit of God resides in me. Yet I still struggle with this heart trouble.
Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit in within me. Psalm 51:10
Give me your heart, my son, and let your eyes delight in my ways. Proverbs 23:26