I’m So Alone

God, where is Your perfect plan in this?  I don’t see it.

God I’m so alone.  Michael was my partner.  We did everything together and now I’m so alone.  I’m scared and afraid and I’ve never liked being alone.  But now I’m so alone.  I want him back and I know he’s not coming back and I’m so alone.

I have friends.  Good friends.  Great friends.  But I’m so alone.

Nothing fills this emptiness up God.  Please fill it up.  I know he’s in a better place but I want him back.

I have my children and they help me and try to be there for me but they have their lives and I’m so alone.

God I know You say You will never leave me or forsake me.  But I’m so alone.  Please put your arms around me.  Let me feel your arms around me.  I don’t want to feel so alone.  I don’t want to be alone. This will never get better.

God please don’t let the enemy win in any of this.  Don’t let him scare me or gain any ground.  Please.  Please.

I cannot even imagine what the next week will be like without Michael.  How will I get through the next year or 5 years?  Or 30 years?

2 thoughts on “I’m So Alone”

  1. Ginger, I understand. It will get better. Just try to get through the next hour. The hours will stack up and you will have made it through a day. Don’t worry about next year or even next month. Just right now. It’s such an empty feeling – I’ve tried to explain it to people and it’s so hard. Gentle hugs to you.

  2. Dear Ginger,
    Lifting you up to God’s loving embrace. My worst time was the quiet darkness before falling asleep – I imagine it is even worse for you. I admire your honesty and willingness to put yourself out there. My prayer is for God’s healing through this process. Love you!

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