What would you do if you knew that tonight was the last night your husband would sleep next to you? Would you hold his hand? Would you study his profile? Would you lay so very close to his side, tucked up under his arm? Would you lay your head on his chest to hear his heart beat and feel him breathe? Would you lay in silence thanking God for him?
What would you do if you knew this would be his last kiss? Would you slow down and make it last longer? Would you memorize every part of it?
What would you do if you knew today would be your husband’s last day in your house? Would you memorize how he gets up and down from his chair? Would you happily serve him his breakfast? Would you watch as he walked out the door knowing that his presence would never be in this room again?
What would you do if you knew this was your last anniversary? Would you spend every second of the day by his side, no matter if that meant medical tests or just sitting in silence with each other? Or would you spend the day at the spa and at dinner with friends without him because you knew this was what he planned and how much pleasure it brought him?
What would you do if you knew that today would be the last day you would hear your husband’s voice? Would you ask him to say “I love you” and so many other sweet things again and again? Would you ask him to sing all those songs he loved to sing in that slightly off-key way he does? Would you try to make him laugh? Or would you want him to tell all his old stories one last time so you could laugh at them?
What would you do if you knew tomorrow morning your husband would make the choice to leave you? Would you beg him to stay? Would you gather all your children so each one could try to understand his decision? Would you beg God to change his mind? Would you beg God to stop his heart so this difficult decision wouldn’t have to be made? Would you be able to sleep?
What would you do if you knew today would be your husband’s last day? Would you stay by his bed and never leave for one breath? Would you ask him to open his eyes every time he closed them so you could look into them one more time? Would you scream at the top of your lungs or just cry quietly? Would you crawl up in the bed to be next to him one last time? Would you beg him to stay? Or would you let him go?
What would you do …….. If you knew?